Even if it wasn’t so much “manipulative”.
You must log in or register to comment.
I have and will continue to make a small number of obvious omissions or minor misspellings in my work when I submit it to my bosses for review. Not in the majority of my work, but mostly when they may have some resistance or hesitation on a course of action or a part of the project.
If I can trick them into contributing to the project by fixing or improving it, they end up feeling ownership of it in a way they wouldn’t have otherwise. I do this on purpose, and turn a hesitater into a champion of the work. It’s our project now!
I ask leading questions that make people think an idea is theirs. Business people love their own ideas. A woman’s? Not so much.
😢
Yeah, it is a bummer. But at this point, I’m old and used to it, and this is the fastest way to get traction on my ideas. 🤷
That’s kinda genius ngl
This is an example of “managing up”. It requires understanding people well, a particular weakness of mine.
Not the most manipulative but
Keep a log of the birthdays, hobbies and names of spouses and children of colleagues, managers, team members and customers.
I learnt this from a guy who did executive search. People remember you, when you remember what is important to them.
When I’ve lead teams it’s one of the first things I find out - note down when someone says “yeah Gary that’s my hubby, he’s super into gaming”
- Gary (husband.)
- likes gaming
When you’re a manager, your teams families, partners and friends know your name. Reciprocating that - learning who is important to them - is really important.
Has this ever backfired on you? While your motive is wholesome, I could see the practice itself seeming creepy. Like keeping notes of someone else’s life.
Yep. There’s people that want to keep distance at work and don’t appreciate it. Just have to respect that and leave them to it.
Yep. There’s people that want to keep distance at work and don’t appreciate it. Just have to respect that and leave them to it.
- Jane (wife.)
- likes the pool cleaner boy and has been sleeping with him behind her husband’s back for 8 months.
Some people just don’t like to have their hobbies shared.
I do this too; it’s a great way to get to know your team and develop genuine bonds. People generally enjoy when you show signs of caring and interest in them beyond their work role.
Maybe not the most manipulative, but it’s the first thing to come to mind…
When I was 21 years old, I was dating a delightful lush who was 19 and it was a bummer that we couldn’t go out drinking together. So, I found a marriage certificate online, put our names on it and printed it out, then copied it. We also went to a department store and spent $20 on a convincing cubic zirconia ring. We pretended to be married because my state’s antiquated laws consider wives to be property of husbands in this regard, so voilà! We could now go out drinking together! And boy did we, haha.
Property?..
Yeah, like livestock! Or a small child! What a time to be alive!
What country is that? Somewhere in Africa?
USA!
Took me a while but I learned one of my managers is highly likely to shoot down any idea that isn’t his. So during planning sessions I started describing partial ideas and pretending I didn’t know how to solve the last leg of the problem so he could jump in and say, “Oh, what if we did…” Still kind of pisses me off I have to feign ignorance but since I started doing that things have gone way smoother.
This is a good way to get your ideas implemented, but your manager is always going to be able to take credit. If you are able to develop a situation with your manager where they see you as equal or near equal, they won’t mind if you bring them in on emails or meetings or whatever with their boss, so you can take the credit you are due. Extra credit if you get them to set up the call or meeting with the three of you and then you get to lay it out.
When I was 20, I started hanging out with a girl who lived in my dorm. We made out and went down to bottom underwear, but never really went far, because she wanted to be sure I wasn’t just after sex. This was because a month break was coming up.
During the break I chatted with her on AIM every day, while I was fucking a girl I went to high school with regularly. I never told her. After the break we started fucking and then I dumped her after a couple months to find a new girl. I was a ravenous asshole.
My karma is here now, because my mental health issues are finally treated, my libido is near zero due to aging and medication.
I talked two people out of suicide. I guess you could call that manipulative, but in a good way.
Depends. Did you talk them into suicidal ideation beforehand?
Nope, one had suicidal ideation because of being harassed by people, the other because of an abusive relationship.
In person I am fanatically polite and helpful to almost everyone. But if you piss me off I will make you feel very bad about yourself.
Mom?
I’m the same way, except instead of making you feel bad about yourself, I will feel bad about myself for feeling so angry at you.
Then if I’m upset enough, I will become moderately less polite or, in even more extreme cases, drop any joviality from my voice and speak to you only in monotone.
