I need advice because I’m scared lol.
Booze helped
Alcohol.
I married her.
It takes work but try to stop giving a fuck what anyone thinks of you. Once I did that my life got so much better. Not to be confused with not caring about others just don’t worry what they think of you. That’s their cross to carry.
How did you do that?
Aging helps. I’m not sure how or why, but these days, I couldnl’t care less about what strangers think of me.
For me it had the opposite effect, sadly. I was pretty confident in myself two years ago, but then I got covid a second time and since then I’m not quite the same. I get nervous all the time and feel stressed easily, which in turn makes me feel sick and sweaty, which makes me nervous again. It’s gotten better through therapy, CBD oil and supplements for the brain, but I’m still not back to my old self and might never be
Honestly? Ate enough mushrooms to annihilate my ego and realized my self worth. I don’t recommend that technique but it worked for me.
How much grams were needed for that?
About 7 for myself although I’ve actually eaten 15 and not had the same experience. Depends on the strength which is hit or miss
Alright, time to order a grow box again!
my social butterfly mother taught me about a “fake-ness” that’s worked well for me in situations like this: when you talk to them, follow every opportunity that reveals something about themselves (eg “you mentioned that you liked the color blue, i kinda like it too because of X, why do you like it?”) and do it even if it bores you and you grasp at straw to keep the conversation going. people love talking about themselves and love it even more with an audience that seems into it and, at the end, either your crush will be dispelled or now your crush is aware of you.
if they act odd after that; then they don’t feel the same way about you that you feel about them and move on. if they do feel the same way about you OR if they don’t, but they still like you; they’ll likewise look for an excuse to tell you more about themselves.
If it doesn’t work out, at least you’ll know and you can move on. If you don’t do it, you’ll regret it forever.
By working on my self-esteem. A lot of the fear is tying your worth on the outcome of approaching your crush.
If you decouple your self-worth on whether your crush reciprocates or not, then you can come as close as you like.
I changed schools. Now, even if I wanted to approach her, I can’t!
Kidding aside, I asked myself “if I am so anxious even approaching her, how can I even be in a relationship with her?” and basically forced myself to decide whether to: “yeah, this is a crush that I won’t be doing anything about it, better to not let it linger and move on” or “I must do something about the anxiety.”
If my feelings is not intense enough for the second option, the feelings will die soon enough, and will not make me regret that much.
In reality, I tend to think “no, they’re more than likely not into me (due to various reasons)”, and I’ll just let the feelings be until they decay. Did it lead to regrets? Not really. The few times I’ve actually asked and approached someone I had a crush on, they were flattered, but ultimately told me they’re not into me. The more it happened, the more I felt justified in my way of thinking.
I didn’t. Have been wondering about „what if“ ever since. So save yourself some grief and do it.
I did it the first time by just setting a date that I was going to tell her I liked her and sticking to that
Unfortunately turned out she had a boyfriend so that sucked
There will be more crushes.
Well, I did not really pursue my little princess with persistence and I was so low-key that she was unaware of my existence.
From a distance I desired her, secretly admired her wired her a letter to get her, and it went:
“My dear, my dear, my dear, you do not know me, but I know you very well, now let me tell you 'bout the feelings I have for you when I try, or make some sort of attempt, I simp - damn, I wish I wasn’t such a wimp - cos then I would let you know that I love you so and if I was your man, then I would be true, and the only lying I would do is in the bed with you.”
Then I signed “Sincerely, the one who loves you dearly, P.S. Love Me Tender.”
You need to take a risk on some level, which probably isn’t what you want to hear, but other commenters have said as much. I think that even worse than a solid “no” is just not doing anything and getting up in your head about the what-ifs, and missing an opportunity entirely.
I find an effective means to resolve my anxiety is to consider the worst possible outcome and resolve within myself if that is an outcome I can withstand.
